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  • rjagundez5

Too Many Hats

It's easy to get lost in the sea of hats I wear.

I'm a cook.

I'm a maid.

I'm a mother.

I'm a wife.

I'm a creator of worlds.

I'm a virtual administrative assistant for a supervisor at a caregiving company.

I'm a nursery coordinator at my church, organizing volunteers, greeting new parents, caring for babies on Sundays.

I'm a friend, a sister, and a daughter, doing my best to stay connected and involved in the lives of others.

I'm pulled in many directions, accosted by multiple voices, needed, needed, needed.

All. The. Time.

"What a wonderful responsibility!" I tell myself most days. "You're so blessed!"

"How I wish someone else would take over," I think in my darkest moments. "I just want a moment's peace and rest."

"If you weren't so busy, you'd lose your mind," says the productive, Energizer bunny on one shoulder.

"You've already lost your mind," says the sleep-deprived Eeyore on my other shoulder. "You need to sleep more."

"Sleep is for the weak!"

"Sleep is for the smart and emotionally-self-aware."

It's hard to weigh in when they both make valid points.

In the end, what can I do?

After all, I made each and every choice that brought me here.

Why do I continue? What is my reward?

A little boy, wrapping his arms around my knees, saying, "I love you, Mommy!"

A little girl, giving sloppy, peanut butter scented kisses.

A baby, constantly rolling and kicking me from within.

A grateful husband.

A group of faithful friends.

A supportive family.

A small but devoted readership.

A kind supervisor.

An understanding church family.

A full life.

The promise of a future where things will be different.

Because nothing--good, bad, or otherwise--lasts forever.

Lord, give me an extra portion of grace that I might pour it out on all of those who depend on me.

And, if it isn't too much trouble, please let this third baby be a good sleeper.


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